My mother has been cleaning houses for seventeen years. She began when I was just a toddler as a result of becoming a single parent needing an income. Being the youngest out of five, all my first experiences were my mother’s last experiences in parenting a child. With my birth coinciding with my father leaving, I represented a beginning but also the end of something. Being torn between these two extremes has shaped our relationship into something quite sensitive.
When I was just an infant, my mother experienced a great deal of depression—post-partum depression as well as depression from her marriage ending. Every year of my life she has struggled, sacrificed, and fought to give my siblings and me everything we could ask for. For twelve years it seemed as though we were doing something right, we were content and things were starting to pay off. That luck ran out.
As I enter my adult life, I’ve become overwhelmed with intense feelings of guilt and responsibility for my mother. I simply cannot stand to see her alone after everything she’s given me. This documentary is a result of my need to take action about my mother’s situation. It has served as therapy for me as I try and materialize these heavy emotions of painful, unconditional love. I’d do anything for my mom and the little girl inside of me wishes she could fix it all and make it better. I believe this film conveys the static state we remain in and our sheer closeness.
This film deals with a subject matter many can relate to—the emotional weight passed between a parent and child. Who is left with the heavier weight, and are we ever released? Do we simply repeat the cycle with our own children? How does one sacrifice their whole life for the lives of their children? All these questions relate to the human condition and are present in most of our lives. I hope to convey my own personal story and offer justice to all Mother’s who have given everything to their children—even the painful parts.
This film is dedicated to my mother. Hazel Louetta Pope: my inspiration, my favorite person on this planet and, the woman who gave me a life more special and unique than most. I love you bigger.